I just read an article about parents whose grand-parents/great grand parents to their children liked to be involved in all the great grand children’s activities, and they liked to drop by unannounced. This really bothered the parents of the great grand children. I don’t know how I feel about that.
I have a sister who is a grandmother, and she likes to be around her kid’s children all the time. Sometimes I think it’s too much but it’s none of my business. I started thinking about drop-in visits. I personally like them. I like that someone feels comfortable enough to drop in and say hi when they’re in the neighborhood. I enjoy people being casual about coming to see me and being spontaneous. I’m one of those people that goes to a lot of planning when I know people are coming over, and then I stress out about it. I’d much rather them drop-in and then come what may, and if the house isn’t pristine then so be it. Let’s face it…no one is a perfect housekeeper (that’s what I want to believe).
I also started thinking about other cultures. My personal experience has been that other cultures aren’t so “uptight” about drop-ins especially when it’s family. I personally think family should always be welcome; no matter what. If they drop in when you’re busy say so; that’s the risk they take when they drop-in, and they should understand. Ask if they’d like to babysit and go get a quick glass of wine with your spouse (how fun would that be). Most of the time grandparents want to see the little kids anyway. How about jumping in the car or walking to get some ice-cream as a family? Have an impromptu pizza party or barbecue?
Ask ourselves how many opportunities for connection are we missing because we require people to call before they come; especially family. Given, set some boundaries, for example; maybe no drop-ins after a certain hour or before another but other then that what’s the problem?
Of course I know I’m the anomaly and most people are crazy about drop-ins so I always call before I come, but I wish I didn’t have to because there are times I’m driving right by, I’m thinking about this person, and want to stop just to say hi.
I say: Loosen up!